But by grade school, your child should be learning skills to help him become a good sport. There are several things you can do to help your child be a more graceful loser while also showing him how to cheer others on, even if doesn't win. If you praise your child for scoring the most goals in the soccer game or for getting the highest grade on his math test, your words will fuel his competitive nature. He may learn that winning or being the best is more important than kindness.
Praise him for his hard work and his effort regardless of the final outcome. Role model good sportsmanship by cheering on the players for doing well and by congratulating the winner, even if it wasn't who you were rooting for. Show your child how to treat other people kindly, no matter the score.
Acknowledge that the officials may make calls that not everyone will like. But, talk about how that is part of the game. Teach your child about feelings and help him develop healthy coping strategies to deal with those feelings. Validate his feelings too. Talk about how it feels sad, embarrassing, and disappointing to lose.
But make it clear he has options in how he deals with his uncomfortable emotions. Sore losers often throw board game pieces or say mean things to other people in a fit of rage. Invest time and energy into teaching your child specific anger management skills that will help him tolerate losing. It can be tempting sometimes to throw the game on purpose so you won't be subjected to a sore loser's negative reaction.
Letting her win will only reinforce to her that she can't handle losing. Each loss is an opportunity for her to practice not being a sore loser. If your child begins to cry, stomp his feet, or throw himself to the ground, ignore it. Avoid consoling him or talking to him when he's misbehaving. As soon as he is calm, give him positive attention again.
When they beat their opponent, they tend to find great joy in rubbing it in and bragging about their victory. You may need to play board games or sports more often with your child simply to give him an opportunity to practice his social skills. Praise him when he is kind and respectful and emphasize that you value how he treats others more than how he plays the game. After each game or event, talk about his sportsmanship. Point out what he did well and discuss any concerns.
With consistent practice, your child can learn how to be a good sport. Get expert tips to help your kids stay healthy and happy. Your Privacy Rights. To change or withdraw your consent choices for VerywellFamily. At any time, you can update your settings through the "EU Privacy" link at the bottom of any page. These choices will be signaled globally to our partners and will not affect browsing data. We and our partners process data to: Actively scan device characteristics for identification.
I Accept Show Purposes. Table of Contents View All. But some experts advise against this. In doing so, you may avoid a tantrum, but you will have also lost an important learning opportunity. Competition teaches kids that persevering through failure can yield future success, and it also strengthens character and builds skill. School-age 6 ways to help a sore loser Everybody wants to win. But you can turn a sore loser into a good sport.
Photo: Stocksy. Model good sportsmanship Whether you are playing a game yourself or watching your favourite sports team lose, model being a good sport —yes, that means no trash-talking or booing! Emphasize the positive At a time when your kid is calm, talk about what it means to have a positive mindset while playing games. Acknowledge empathy When your kid does handle losing and winning well, be sure to acknowledge it.
Be a calm-down coach Teach your kid to take a few slow, deep breaths or count backwards from 10 when she starts to feel upset. Joseph Communications uses cookies for personalization, to customize its online advertisements, and for other purposes. Learn more or change your cookie preferences.
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